A hole was found in the wall of a nudist camp. The police are looking into it.


I told my wife she drew her eyebrows on too high. She looked surprised.


I really hate those people who knock at your door and tell you how you need to be ‘saved’ or you’ll ‘burn.’
Stupid firemen.


Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever thought about your X and wondered Y?


What do you call a wolf that knows what’s going on?


Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the toilet? Because it has a silent p


Is it bad to tell knock knock jokes to homeless people?


What’s the difference between a golfer and a skydiver? A golfer goes *whack* “damn” and a skydiver goes “damn” *whack*


I have a fear of speed bumps. Im slowly getting over it


My wife screamed “Ugh you haven’t heard a word I said, have you!?”
What a strange way to start a conversation


I’ve decided to sell my Hoover … well, it was just collecting dust


I called the vet to complain about a bill. He just put the phone down. As quickly and humanely as possible.


My tailor is happy to make a pair of pants for me, or at least sew it seams.


I wanted to watch the world origami championship on TV but it was only on paper view.


How did Darth Vader know what Luke got him for Christmas?
He felt his presents


Do skunks celebrate Valentine’s Day? Sure, they’re very scent-imental!

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