#780
Whats the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
The Christmas alphabet has Noel.
#779
What computer sings the best?
A Dell
#778
What do you call a duck with a drug problem?
A quackhead
#777
I lost my mood ring and I don’t know how to feel about it
#776
What do you call two guys sitting in a windowsill?
Kurt and Rod
#775
How do billboards communicate?
Sign language
#774
My friends bakery burned down last night.
His business is toast
#773
I’m so introverted I won’t even talk to myself.
#772
You’re not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
#771
What is Mozart doing right now?
Decomposing
#770
What do you call a bird who drinks too much?
An owlcoholic
#769
I got fired from candle factory because I refused to work wick ends
#768
Where does Buzz Lightyear go furniture shopping at? Bed, Bath, and BEYOND!
#767
My dad used to say “Always fight fire with fire.” Probably explains why he was thrown out of the fire brigade
#766
Where do pencils go on vacation? Pencilvania
#765
I have only seen people underwhelmed or overwhelmed, never whelmed properly.
#764
What do vegan dogs eat? Bark
#763
The plumber told me a hole boring story about pipes.
#762
I felt so bad today…I saw this sad dog without a tail. Luckily, his owner was taking him to the retail store.
#761
What do you call a mind reader who can’t read minds? A telepathetic.