Give a Nigerian a fish he’ll eat for a day. Teach a Nigerian to phish and he’ll become a prince and start e-mailing people

What do you call an Asian lady with one leg?
Irene

I am so poor I can’t even pay attention.

Wanna hear a potassium joke?
K

How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You look for the fresh prints

PMS jokes aren’t funny. Period.

My wife says I’m immature. I told her to get out of my fort

What kind of bees make milk?
Boobies

Is google a woman? Because it won’t let you finish your sentence without coming up with other suggestions.

Where do fish work? The offish.

The seven dwarfs were in the bath feeling happy so he got out.

Women sometimes make fools of men, but most guys are the do-it-yourself type.

I have a stepladder. Because my real ladder left when I was a kid

Best Summer Vacation Book Never Written: “Where to Stay on Vacation” by Moe Tell.

I was cleaning one of my finger guns and accidentally blew a hole through my air guitar.

Did you know I was bilingual? Yeah I speak English and profanity

30 seconds left on the microwave.
Women: set table, pour drinks, tweet, talk on the phone.
Men: do the space shuttle countdown.

What do you call a bee with a low buzz?
A mumblebee