#798
A jumper cable walked into a bar, the bartender said “I’ll serve you, but don’t start anything!”
#507
Why did the blonde stare at frozen orange juice can for 2 hours? Because it said ‘concentrate’.
#790
One of my mates is selling his budgie.
Unfortunately it’s not going cheap
#506
I just wrote a book on reverse psychology. Do *not* read it!
#154
I have a fear of speed bumps. Im slowly getting over it
#187
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
#660
I just read a book about Stockholm syndrome. It was pretty bad at first but by the end I kinda liked it
#683
What does Batman put in his drink?
Just Ice
#52
It’s not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn’t have the balls to do it.
#806
Did you hear about the short-sighted circumciser?
He got the sack
#760
What kind of currency do chickens use? Bock bucks
#674
I haven’t slept for three days, because that would be too long.
#855
If you lose your hearing, is it ear replaceable?
#240
PMS jokes aren’t funny. Period.
#722
What do you call a guy covered in leaves?
Russell
#291
What is Bruce Lee’s favourite drink? Wataaaaahh!
#702
What do you call it when Batman skips church? Christian Bale.
#370
The seven dwarfs were in the bath feeling happy so he got out.
#366
Why do all of P-Diddy’s kids have nice hair?
Because Sean Combs
#786
Interviewer asked me if I’d make a good waiter.
Let’s just say I can bring a lot to the table
