#609
I did a theatrical performance on puns.
It was a play on words.
I did a theatrical performance on puns.
It was a play on words.
I called the vet to complain about a bill. He just put the phone down. As quickly and humanely as possible.
Living on earth may be expensive, but it includes an annual free trip around the sun.
Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humour.
3 people having sex is a threesome, 2 is a twosome. So next time someone calls you ‘handsome’, don’t take it as a compliment!
Two bars walk into a man, LSD is powerful stuff
What do you call a three-legged donkey? A wonkey.
Why did the snowman smile?
Because the snowblower was coming
What computer sings the best?
A Dell
Why canโt you take inventory in Afghanistan?
Because of the tally ban
The first rule of Alzheimer’s club, is don’t talk about chess club
When you have a bladder infection, urine trouble
I wasnโt particularly close to my dad before he died…
Which was lucky, because he trod on a landmine.
I wasn’t happy with my sons school report. He said okay. I said I want more A’s. He said okaaaaaaaay
If Tinkerbell had a Mexican sister what would her name be?
Taco Bell
My friend just got a job at the zoo, circumcising elephants. The pay isn’t great but he gets huge tips.
Let’s hope the new Jurassic world movie isn’t a train Rex of a film.
When he proposed to her. She found it very engaging.
How do Mexicans stay warm in winter? Fajitas
Currently the flower business is blooming.