Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humour.

How do snakes end a fight?
They hiss and make up

When are holes beautiful? When they’re gorges.

Someone threw cheese at me.
Real mature!

How do you count cows? With a cowculater.

I’ve found a job helping a one armed typist do capital letters.
It’s shift work.

Where are average things manufactured?
The satisfactory

Several guys are sitting around having a drink and one guy says “My wife’s an angel” another guy says “Your lucky, mines still alive.”

My girlfriend and I often laugh about how competitive we are. But I laugh more.

Why did the pig stop sunbathing? He was bacon in the heat

If canola oil comes from canola, where does baby oil come from?

The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette.

Whoever invented knock knock jokes should get a no bell prize.

I saw an ad for burial plots, and thought to myself this is the last thing I need.

What do you call a woman that sets her bills on fire? Bernadette

Blonde: “What does IDK mean?”

Brunette: “I don’t know.”

Blonde: “OMG, nobody does!”