#880
I have six eyes, two mouths and three ears. What am I? Ugly
#403
It puzzles me that a bra is singular and panties are plural.
#832
My wife said “Black really is slimming on you, you’ve never looked sexier”.
I said “Turn the light back on”.
#833
My wife finally got a “Brazilian”. He seems nice.
#367
Did you know that Snoop Dogg’s sister is a stripper?
She wears nothing but a g-string baby
#66
My wife told me I was average, I think she’s mean.
#887
An old man threw out his hip.. What a waist
#764
What do vegan dogs eat? Bark
#214
What was the demon arrested for?
Possession
#408
Who is the best king fu vegetable?
Brocc Lee
#542
The sex was so good that even the neighbors had a cigarette.
#22
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s fine, he woke up
#412
Why did the mobile phone need glasses?
It lost all its contacts
#770
What do you call a bird who drinks too much?
An owlcoholic
#305
Lets have a toast for the bread winners!
#187
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
#67
What has four letters
#195
What kind of prize do you give someone who hasn’t moved a muscle in over a year?
Atrophy.
#507
Why did the blonde stare at frozen orange juice can for 2 hours? Because it said ‘concentrate’.
#42
What do you call a woman with a toothpick up her butt?
Olive