#880
I have six eyes, two mouths and three ears. What am I? Ugly
#769
I got fired from candle factory because I refused to work wick ends
#533
An African-American guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. It’s called Nacho Mama.
#168
What does cheese say when it sees itself in the mirror? Halloumi
#804
What grows under your nose?
Tulips
#56
A friend of mine tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.
#373
Where did Mary go after the explosion?
Everywhere
#737
You can’t run through a camping ground. You can only ran, because it’s past tents
#6
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh
#796
My mate just got fired from the mint factory.
His wife went absolutely menthol
#808
My friend has been a limo driver for 25 years and has never had a customer.
All that time and nothing to chauffeur it
#571
NSA Pickup Line #1:
Did you fall from heaven?
Because there’s no tracking data on how you arrived at this location
#490
Several guys are sitting around having a drink and one guy says “My wife’s an angel” another guy says “Your lucky, mines still alive.”
#22
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s fine, he woke up
#884
What was Helen Keller’s favourite colour?
Velcro
#664
What did one lumber jack say to another lumber jack?
“I need to axe you a question”
#652
So this guy with a premature ejaculation problem comes out of nowhere
#449
Did you hear about the theme park ride made entirely out of iron?
It was a ferrous wheel
#354
Sometimes I tuck my knees into my chest and lean forward. That’s just how I roll.
#34
What do you call a lady with one leg?
Eileen