Did you hear about the theme park ride made entirely out of iron?
It was a ferrous wheel

My cats gonna sh** when he sees his new litter box I got him for Christmas.

My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that.

Prison may be just one word. But to some, it’s a whole sentence.

When I think of books, I touch my shelf.

I love the F5 key. It´s just so refreshing.

You heard of that new band 1023MB? They’re good but they haven’t got a gig yet.

If you’re looking for quality, never buy fireworks from a guy with more than seven fingers.

I asked my North Korean friend how it was there, he said he couldn’t complain

I can totally keep secrets. It’s the people I tell them to that can’t.

Why did Humpty Dumpty push his girlfriend off the wall? So he could see her crack!

Did you hear about the man who was accidentally buried alive?
It was a grave mistake.

What’s it like being in a vacuum cleaner? It sucks

When does a sandwich cook?
When it’s bakin lettuce and tomato

Best Summer Vacation Book Never Written: “Where to Stay on Vacation” by Moe Tell.

I’m addicted to brake fluid but I can stop whenever I want

I wasn’t happy with my sons school report. He said okay. I said I want more A’s. He said okaaaaaaaay

They’re always telling me to live my dreams. But I don’t want to be naked in an exam I haven’t revised for!

What kind of currency do chickens use? Bock bucks