Yeah, it was on Fry Day, I can’t believe they got killed for the halibut. No motive, someone should seas the culprit. I’m crabby bout it all

What’s the difference between a joke and a rhetorical question?

What do you get when a cow jumps over a barbed wire fence? An udder disaster.

I can only tell you a bad chemistry joke because all the good ones Argon

What happened to the cannibal that was late to dinner?
He was given the cold shoulder

My dad always told me “Don’t be quick to find faults”.
Good man, terrible geologist.

i thought i got a type a in blood test but it was actually a typ-o

What did the buffalo say to his son? Bison

I threw an Asian man down a flight of stairs. It was Wong on so many levels.

My girlfriend and I often laugh about how competitive we are. But I laugh more.

How was Rome split in two?
With a pair of Caesars

Hedgehogs — why can’t they just share the hedge

Give a Nigerian a fish he’ll eat for a day. Teach a Nigerian to phish and he’ll become a prince and start e-mailing people

Do not argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.

Don’t you hate it when someone answers their own questions? I do.

The police came to my house and asked where I was between 3 and 5 . I told them pre school.

I went to a busy pub last night dressed as a tennis ball.
I got served straight away.

People are making end of the world jokes like there is no tomorrow.