#657

No deja vu please…
I don’t want to go through that again

#100

Relationships between men and women is psychological.
She is psycho and he is logical.

#270

This guy just had a dangerous mole removed from the end of his penis. Definitely won’t be shagging one of those again

#815

How do animals hide in the desert?
They use camel-flage.

#301

What’s the definition of a will? (It’s a dead giveaway)

#351

How much did it cost for the pirate to get his ears pierced?.

A buccaneer

#517

1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It’s either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother Colin. Or my younger brother Ho-Cha-Chu. But I think it’s Colin.

#737

You can’t run through a camping ground. You can only ran, because it’s past tents

#483

What do you call an academically successful slice of bread? An honor roll.

#294

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.

#497

Doing things that you are not supposed to do at work makes your vision, hearing and alertness much better.

#98

“Your finest Scotch, please.” “Yes, sir,” the guy at Officeworks says as he hands me a 12 year old roll of tape.

#386

Have you ever tried eating a clock? It’s time consuming

#755

A hole was found in the wall of a nudist camp. The police are looking into it.

#322

Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl in the toilet? Because it has a silent p

#317

I just deleted all the German names off my phone. It’s Hans free

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