I did a theatrical performance on puns.
It was a play on words.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head?
Jack

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees?
Because they’re so good at it!

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.
not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

What do you call a Far Eastern monk who sells reincarnations?
A used karma dealer

I’d like to thank the girl with no sports bra who ran with me through the last few miles of yesterday’s marathon.

Your lack of support got me through

I’m here for whatever you need me to do… from the couch.

Where are average things manufactured?
The satisfactory

Have I told you this deja vu joke before?

A bear walked into a bar and says, “I’ll have a beer……and some of those peanuts.” The bartender says, “Why the big pause?”

When life gives you melons, you’re probably dyslexic.

How do you find Will Smith in the snow?
You look for the fresh prints

I was cleaning one of my finger guns and accidentally blew a hole through my air guitar.

What do you call a lady with one leg?
Eileen

What do you call a woman with no legs? Nolene