Why did Santa’s helper get depressed?
He had low elf esteem

The first rule of Alzheimer’s club, is don’t talk about chess club

What kind of bees make milk?
Boobies

Doctor, I feel like a wigwam and a teepee. Trouble is, you’re too tense.

Do skunks celebrate Valentine’s Day? Sure, they’re very scent-imental!

My tailor is happy to make a pair of pants for me, or at least sew it seams.

What do PCs and air conditioners have in common?
They both become useless when you open windows

i thought i got a type a in blood test but it was actually a typ-o

When Jay-Z got engaged, did he call her his Feyonce?

My speech today will be like a mini-skirt. Long enough to cover the essentials but short enough to hold your attention!

What does Batman put in his drink?

Just Ice

Have you heard about corduroy pillows?
They’re making headlines.

I wanted to watch the world origami championship on TV but it was only on paper view.

Do you know why i make puns?
its my respunsibility.

What do you call a Mexican with a vasectomy?
A dry Martinez

Waitress: ‘Do u have any questions about the menu?’ Me: ‘What kind of font is this?’

I was cleaning one of my finger guns and accidentally blew a hole through my air guitar.