#293
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocaine during a root canal? His goal: transcend dental medication
#69
When Jay-Z got engaged, did he call her his Feyonce?
#183
There was a prison break and I saw a midget climb up the fence. As he jumped down her sneered at me and I thought, well that’s a little condescending.
#414
What did Michael Jackson call his denim store?
Billie Jeans
#173
What’s the leading cause of dry skin? Towels
#215
White boards are remarkable
#394
What do you call dental x-rays?
Tooth pics
#823
Why did the grandma put wheels on her rocking chair? She liked to rock and roll
#748
It’s better to have a bottle in front of me, than a frontal lobotomy.
#787
Murphy’s law states anything that can go wrong will go wrong, but have you heard of Cole’s law? It’s finely sliced cabbage.
#159
How many Freudians does it take to change a light bulb? Sex.
#505
Living on earth may be expensive, but it includes an annual free trip around the sun.
#413
I’m great at multitasking.
I can waste time, be unproductive and procrastinate all at once!
#831
I was having a dip at the swimming pool when the lifeguard asked, “What have you got there?” I said “Tzatziki”.
#443
Yesterday, I fell down from a 10 meter ladder. Thank God I was on the third step.
#546
If we get rid of all the margarine the world will be a butter place.
#528
I work in a library. Literally, all we do is judge books by their covers.
#103
My ex-wife has lessons with the devil on how to be more evil. I don’t know what she charges him.
#537
Best Summer Vacation Book Never Written: “Where to Stay on Vacation” by Moe Tell.
#580
What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards?
A receding hare-line